Before I begin today for the last installment of my blog for this season, I would like to take a moment to pass along my condolences to Ashley's family in their time of loss. I can't imagine how difficult it must have been for Ashley to lose her sister, Amy Winehouse, they have my sympathy.
So how about dem apples? Ashley picks her man JP and sends Ben off to fish for a new lady for his life, no literally he went home in a fishing boat! And on the wings of love Ashley and JP will ride the fame that is the life of tabloid reality stars. But how did we get here, what happened in those final two hours that actually made the finale interesting enough to watch? Saving you the time of firing up your DVR, I'm here with the highlights.
The first date was with JP, but I'm going to start off with Mr. Excitement, Ben. I don't know what it is about this guy but for some reason he just seemed so even keel that I couldn't tell if he had a pulse or not. Go back a couple weeks to the hometown dates and I think that I actually made the comment that his family looked like they were still attending his dad's funeral 4 years later. Granted it must be tough, but there just didn't look like a lot of life in that family, and these people make wine for a living! Anyway back to Fiji and the Drama initiative (Lost reference /wink), in order to prove how much love that Ashely and Ben had for each other they proceeded to make fake dog noises and look like complete idiots. Warning to all of you young lovers out there, love may make you look silly at times but it's no reason to look like that. It isn't love, it's just sad. And if that is Ashley being herself than wow, poor girl.
All of the above is not to say that Ben is a bad guy, actually I liked him more by nights end. While he basically seemed asleep for the season with the emotional zest of an aging bottle of wine, there was something that seemed genuine about him so you have to respect that. Unfortunately for him, Ashley didn't have that respect, or ABC didn't have that respect, not sure who to blame so let's just point two fingers. Ben fresh of ring shopping arrives in a water plane to ask the women whom he thought he was in love with to be his wife. As he comes to the sacrificial alter just looking at Ashley you knew what was coming, but Ben apparently didn't. He gets down on one knee and asks Ashley to be his wife, professing his love for her. Not to say that Ashley is an attention whore (oops just did) but she let's him go through his whole speech only to pick him up afterwards and tell him to take a hike. Was it her or was it ABC??? I'm really not sure.
Dejected Ben makes the comment of the night.
"All good things end badly."
"Do you really believe that?"
"Apparently" (or something like that)
Great quote, because it's true. Now go sprinkle that on your morning corn flakes, ummmm tastes bitter.
But the humiliation of being rejected on national TV wasn't enough, ABC spared no expense in rubbing in Ben's defeat. Instead of a plane flight back, he was given a 12 foot fishing boat that was left sailing into the open sea of the Pacific. Good luck Ben! I even loved the long walk that they made him take back to the dock, no car, just a long ass walk in front of the camera, now THAT is the walk of shame! The worst part of all of it was that I really think he had a thing for Ashley, I don't speak crazy dog language but it must have been in there where he thought that she was going to be his bitch for life. At least if Ben needs a stiff drink to wash away his sorrow, he has an entire vineyard, and I guess he is already dating again so Go Ben!
Before I talk about JP, I'd just like to point out that, I picked it! You can ask my wife, really early on I thought that JP would be the guy. Oh sure my wife had her reality Steve giving away answers but he was my pick early on. I also picked Alabama two years ago for that National Championship (too much girl talk, must add a little football), I might be a profit, just saying... =)
Anyway JP's visit with the family can be summed up in one conversation, that being the one with Ashley's sister, Amy Winehouse. Being the "rational" one she was quick to judge JP as being wrong for her sister. After all nothing says rational like a divorced, madly tattooed, insensitive bitch. Sure Ashley is an emotional mess, but yeah just yeah... In her five minutes with JP, Amy (yes I know it's Christy, or something like that, don't really care) makes the statement that he isn't right for her sister, sending Ashley into a tailspin of tears yet again this season. FYI, Fiji weren't a set of islands before Ashley and her tears got here. Then Amy went after JP directly with the, "You don't make my sister laugh, so you're wrong for her." JP was pretty good in his response, he played it pretty cool, but was upset, and rightfully so.
The problem for Amy is that she didn't see the rest of the season like we did. JP had an inside track early on, from the ashes of Bentley he rose up. In their first one on one date, he came over to her house after she had just been heartbroken by Bentley, JP was that shoulder to cry on and as such he formed the deepest emotional connection to him at that moment. When Bentley came back, who did she tell first? It wasn't Lucas on his one on one date, nope it was JP, then she told the rest of the guys who then freaked out. It was clear at the moment that she told him when Bentley came back that he was the guy that she was going to pick. They might have gone too far down the friendship road, and that may still burn them, but so far so good.
I saw that the tabloids are already going after JP saying that he is a player and what not, but I don't see it. Too me he looked honest, he looked like a guy that had been hurt in the past and was moving on with his life. I don't think that he was on the rebound, I think that he was just over it with the past, been there done that. Ashley on the other hand, I'm not so sure about...
Ashley's bond with JP formed in the wreckage of the Bentley disaster, and was reaffirmed when he came back. Ashley just appears to lack any self confidence, from her continual need for attention, her checklists of where the relationships are at, and her diverse collection of stripper clothes, she just doesn't seem to be emotionally stable. Hell her sister even kind of told us that, Ashley wasn't herself around JP, is that a bad thing??? Sometimes it's not about what you want but about what you need, I could be wrong but JP, being older might have been the stability that she needs, and she knows it in her mind, but her heart might not be ready to come along for the ride. I guess we'll see. I liked JP early on, he's the type of guy that I would hang with, so hopefully it works out for the both of them, I don't really like Ashley but whatever, here's to hoping for him. I'm sure the tabloids will come out next week telling us all what a terrible guy he is and I'll look really stupid. I should probably practice my dog talk in preparation.
So in the end do I think that they will make it? Actually yes. I was going to say no because I was thinking that Ashley would get bored and move on, but he seems to be completely infatuated with her, thus she'll hold his attention, her being the attention whore, seems like a good fit.
And with that, the season is over and my blog goes back into hiding until the time is right to bring it back out of the shadows and mock something else going on on TV. Sadly I can't see ever doing something like a Lost write up again, but oh how I wish... So if anyone happens to write for a magazine, I'm looking for a place to write more of my nonsense, imagine if I took the time to proof read I might be amazing!!! Just kidding, I'll still suck, but it won't stop me from writing, just like the graceful Albatross as it makes a perfect landing, so shall I.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5AsOjx_Twtw&feature=related
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Ashley, the dating fembot
There was a point last night where I just felt sad for all of those that had signed up to be on the show. Actually it wasn't a single point, it was more like a specific point for each person on the show. For Ben it had to be where he was poring out all of his emotions about his dad on national TV, and Ashley just kind of sitting there. For JP it was his family constantly bringing up his failed past relationship, no idea what it was, but I have a feeling it had something to do with his ex cheating on him. Seriously if you're on the show, just tell us what happened, it sure would have been a lot more exciting then the 2 hours of crap that we got to sit through last night.
Then there was Ames, poor poor Ames. Maybe it's just me being bad, but I couldn't help but laugh out loud when he didn't get a rose. I was reminded of the old Bugs Bunny cartoons where the dog would be left in the country on the side of the road wondering if his master was coming back. The man was clearly blindsided by Ashley's calculated decision (more on that in a moment) to let him go. I felt bad for the guy because he really looked so completely innocent in that moment, but still it was funny. Am I bad for laughing at his anguish, naw, it's reality TV, he signed up for it.
So what about Ashley? Thankfully she was wearing clothes this week, that's a plus, maybe we need the parents to come along to Fiji. A little skin from time to time is ok, but when it's all the time, it just gets trashy and desperate, I guess I'm going to get a whole lot of trashy and desperate next week aren't I, oh brother. But this isn't Project Runway (I just realized that I know far too many of my wives shows, I'm a little shaken by this) no this is the Dating Game, yes it's a game, if you think it's a serious effort to find love and romance, then you probably also think that the vampires in Twilight are cool, they're not, vampires aren't allowed to go out in the daylight. No the Bachelorette has been reduced to who can get into Ashley's skin tight pants by the end of the show. There is no love here, it's all a game, and you know what, I'm sad that it is, I actually would like to see a show where these people had real emotions, where you could root and hope for them. Sorry tangent...
Anyway getting back to my point, Ashley is approaching this like a robot. In your life how many times have you ever made the comment, "I like the direction where this relationship is going." or "I think that we're at this point in the relationship..." When you fall in love with someone you're not spending the whole time analyzing where you're at in the relationship, it's not something that needs to be said, you just are. Instead Ashley is keeping a leader board for where each guy is in their relationship with her. Who is ahead this week? Has our relationship hit this milestone yet... It's all a paint by the numbers relationship where everything is supposed to meet a checklist and if it gets checked off then the relationship can go forward. Outside of Bentley I haven't seen anything from Ashley that actually looks like she has any emotions inside of her at all. Besides for the emotions that she is "supposed" to have during a given event. And I think that is my biggest problem with her, none of it seems genuine, it all seems like she doesn't know how to be herself so she spends the entire time trying to be the person that she is supposed to be at that moment. It's hard to describe but it just doesn't look real.
Case in point of how robotic that Ashley is. When Ames's sister was telling her about Ames's father and step father both dieing of cancer, Ashely just sat there with a smile nodding her head. To me it just looked like she wasn't interested in what the sister had to say, instead it was Ashley waiting to get back to her getting approval from the sister, again the check list.
How about Constantine's family and how Ashley was with them. Ok sure she got into the dancing, but Ashley's happy face there looks the same as her happy face in all of the other situations in past weeks. It's that look of "I think I'm happy, I'm supposed to be happy." But not the look of "I am happy". Might just be me...
Still the only guy that she should pick at the end of this is JP, the guy actually has feeling for her. And I believe him when he says that he knows where he is after his past relationship. So while I can't really see Ashley as being any sort of catch, good luck to him, he looks to have genuine feelings to me so hopefully that works out. Too bad according to the tabloids it doesn't but hey here is to hope.
So next week we get to see "The best place in the world to fall in love with someone." Fiji, no wait I thought the best place to fall in love with someone was Thailand, or was that Taiwan, or was it Hong Honk??? It seems like everyplace is the "The best place to fall in love". ABC seriously it's just getting sad now. Just pick one and move on with it, don't keep feeding them lines on what to say. It's reality TV if you think the people you picked are boring, do us all a favor and pick better people.
That's my thoughts on this week. Sorry if I don't have much better to say about the show, but the two hours that it's on really drag on. The take home dates are the same every season, everyone is all supportive but one family member has to grill the bachelor or bachelorette and then in the end approve of them. Next week it will be a very neat date that ends with a romantic dinner and a ticket to the fantasy suite, wooooooooooooooooooo. And I'll just leave it at that.
Then there was Ames, poor poor Ames. Maybe it's just me being bad, but I couldn't help but laugh out loud when he didn't get a rose. I was reminded of the old Bugs Bunny cartoons where the dog would be left in the country on the side of the road wondering if his master was coming back. The man was clearly blindsided by Ashley's calculated decision (more on that in a moment) to let him go. I felt bad for the guy because he really looked so completely innocent in that moment, but still it was funny. Am I bad for laughing at his anguish, naw, it's reality TV, he signed up for it.
So what about Ashley? Thankfully she was wearing clothes this week, that's a plus, maybe we need the parents to come along to Fiji. A little skin from time to time is ok, but when it's all the time, it just gets trashy and desperate, I guess I'm going to get a whole lot of trashy and desperate next week aren't I, oh brother. But this isn't Project Runway (I just realized that I know far too many of my wives shows, I'm a little shaken by this) no this is the Dating Game, yes it's a game, if you think it's a serious effort to find love and romance, then you probably also think that the vampires in Twilight are cool, they're not, vampires aren't allowed to go out in the daylight. No the Bachelorette has been reduced to who can get into Ashley's skin tight pants by the end of the show. There is no love here, it's all a game, and you know what, I'm sad that it is, I actually would like to see a show where these people had real emotions, where you could root and hope for them. Sorry tangent...
Anyway getting back to my point, Ashley is approaching this like a robot. In your life how many times have you ever made the comment, "I like the direction where this relationship is going." or "I think that we're at this point in the relationship..." When you fall in love with someone you're not spending the whole time analyzing where you're at in the relationship, it's not something that needs to be said, you just are. Instead Ashley is keeping a leader board for where each guy is in their relationship with her. Who is ahead this week? Has our relationship hit this milestone yet... It's all a paint by the numbers relationship where everything is supposed to meet a checklist and if it gets checked off then the relationship can go forward. Outside of Bentley I haven't seen anything from Ashley that actually looks like she has any emotions inside of her at all. Besides for the emotions that she is "supposed" to have during a given event. And I think that is my biggest problem with her, none of it seems genuine, it all seems like she doesn't know how to be herself so she spends the entire time trying to be the person that she is supposed to be at that moment. It's hard to describe but it just doesn't look real.
Case in point of how robotic that Ashley is. When Ames's sister was telling her about Ames's father and step father both dieing of cancer, Ashely just sat there with a smile nodding her head. To me it just looked like she wasn't interested in what the sister had to say, instead it was Ashley waiting to get back to her getting approval from the sister, again the check list.
How about Constantine's family and how Ashley was with them. Ok sure she got into the dancing, but Ashley's happy face there looks the same as her happy face in all of the other situations in past weeks. It's that look of "I think I'm happy, I'm supposed to be happy." But not the look of "I am happy". Might just be me...
Still the only guy that she should pick at the end of this is JP, the guy actually has feeling for her. And I believe him when he says that he knows where he is after his past relationship. So while I can't really see Ashley as being any sort of catch, good luck to him, he looks to have genuine feelings to me so hopefully that works out. Too bad according to the tabloids it doesn't but hey here is to hope.
So next week we get to see "The best place in the world to fall in love with someone." Fiji, no wait I thought the best place to fall in love with someone was Thailand, or was that Taiwan, or was it Hong Honk??? It seems like everyplace is the "The best place to fall in love". ABC seriously it's just getting sad now. Just pick one and move on with it, don't keep feeding them lines on what to say. It's reality TV if you think the people you picked are boring, do us all a favor and pick better people.
That's my thoughts on this week. Sorry if I don't have much better to say about the show, but the two hours that it's on really drag on. The take home dates are the same every season, everyone is all supportive but one family member has to grill the bachelor or bachelorette and then in the end approve of them. Next week it will be a very neat date that ends with a romantic dinner and a ticket to the fantasy suite, wooooooooooooooooooo. And I'll just leave it at that.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Bachelorette - Reality bites
Today's isn't as funny, with 2 hours worth of show to talk about it's tough to cover everything.
I find myself in a little bit of a problem writing this blog this morning. The normal side of me wants to just tear into the show once again, because I find enjoyment out of that sort of thing. But the other half of me was struck last night by a feeling of sympathy for poor old Ashley. I mean let's face it, there is TONS of things that could be pulled from the episode last night that would constitute as funny, but now it might just be mean. At the end of the show last night it was hard not to feel bad for her, and that's when we realized that you know what, it's finally become a reality TV show.
But Adam, it's always been a reality show. Right... Last night was interesting because Ashley was completely blown away by how the guys rejected her explanation about Bentley, and that was when it all became real. At that moment, and after watching the show for a couple years with my wife, that was the first time that it really looked like the emotions were 100% genuine. It just always seemed in the past that the emotions were manufactured to a good extent by the situations and the editing, heck even Ashley's feelings for Bentley didn't seem altogether real, and we know where he stood on the whole thing. So watching the guys blow up in her face and her breaking down into tears was refreshing to me, here was reality TV where people actually got hurt by each others actions. Not like getting mad on Survivor that someone betrayed your alliance, "uh duh they're trying to win too, it was only a matter of time" or Keeping up with the Kardassians, "My butt is so big, it's soo hard to be rich and famous for no reason, and then to have people only look at my butt after making a sex tape. It's just soo hard and people don't understand" type of reality.
(Of course Amazing Race is still the best in my opinion, you can't fake a crappy taxi ride in India. Man I'd love to go on that show.)
So with all of that being said, how on Earth can I possibly rip on Ashley and her stripper platform heels? Maybe I'll just have to write this and then come back months later after everyone reads it and sees that I'm going soft and then re-edit in some footage, er I mean text so that I won't look like a tool. If only I knew where to find an example of that type of clever clean up... Oh I know... Last night...
During the first 5 minutes of the show you had Ashley doing a voice over which basically made her sound a lot tougher about the whole Bentley thing than she did last week. I mean ABC would never go back and rework the episode a little bit to make Ashley look a little better now would they??? It's not on the level of Han shooting first, but it's kind of funny that they might do it.
(As for the Han shot first reference, in the original Star Wars, Han Solo is confronted with a bounty hunter in the cantina. When the alien [Geedo] says that he's going to turn him in to Jaba for the bounty, Han shoots and kills him. In the re-editted versions that Lucas has since put out, the movie has been editted so that Greedo shoots at Han and misses and then Han shoots in retaliation. To make it look like Han is a better hero or something.)
Oh sorry I got off on a major tangent there.
So after typing for the last 20 minutes talking about everything except the show, let's talk about the show. Ashley after a night of rewirtting history meets up with Chris in the CONRAD hotel (thank you ABC, if I ever travel to Hong Kong I will make sure that I stay there) at which time Chris tells Ashley that Bentley is there in the hotel. Ashley quickly tells Chris to "shut up". My wife would latter tell me that she wasn't really telling him to shut up, it was just an expression. I'll never understand women...
Anyway she makes her way up to his room, what I want to know is what was she really thinking at this point? Was she thinking that oh boy he came back for me, now we can go get married. Was she thinking, he's here so that I can finally get closure and move on with "the process"? I'm going with the whole narration at the beginning of the show was bullshit and that she wasn't looking for closure, she was really hoping that upon opening that door that he was going to rejoin the show.
So she knocks on the door and he answers, "Who is it?" Really? There is a freakin peep hole in the door you moron. Granted she's only like 4 feet tall, but come on. The conversation after that point is essentially more of him trying to lead her on and that once the show is over she should still come to Salt Lake to see him and see if it works out. At some point I'm guessing that ABC stepped in and told her off camera what he had really said to the cameras so that she would actually be pressed enough to get to the bottom of his crap. And good for Ashley, it really looked genuine where she realized what an idiot that she had been, you go girl! lol
Someone is probably asking, why did Bentley even come back on the show so that she could confront him? Two reasons, more fame, which will play out wonderfully when he is on Bachelor Pad, and the second they gave him a free trip to Hong Kong to stay for 5 days and 6 nights at the luxurious Conrad hotel, located in downtown Hong Kong. While there, he'll enjoy taking in the local cuisine, traveling to the legendary great wall, and, oh wait sorry I'm doing my commercial thing again... (dot dot dot, bastards ruined those for me).
On to date number 1, Lucas the oil man from shithole, I mean Odessa, Texas. Anyone else wonder if he played for the high school football team there? I hear it's a big thing there Friday nights, under the lights...
Fresh on the rebound we found our two lovebirds wondering the streets of Hong Kong in what is the theme this season of shopping in street markets. On the junk the two of them had what looked like a very odd romantic dinner where Lucas went on to tell Ashley about his ex and how that just didn't work out, yada yada yada. I really thought that she wasn't going to give him a rose, they just don't seem like a real couple. Ashley is a women with big city dreams and looks like she wants more than to be a dentist in Philadelphia. Lucas on the other hand is as Western Texas as you can get, he's small town, he works in an oil field, or something like that, seriously he's not too far from Jet and Cord from the Amazing Race last season. It's not an insult, he's just very different than her. But here he is being open and honest with her about his past, and hey he got a rose for it.
Now let's jump to the final part of the show, weren't we all expecting that Lucas was going to give that rose back to Ashley? I mean shouldn't he have? Here he was being open and honest with her and in return she's holding back telling him about what just happened with Bentley the day before. To make matters worse, she actually told JP on their one on one date a couple days later. If I'm Lucas, I'm out. If she feels that she can tell another man about what is going on and her emotions but can't tell me, then who is she closer to? Dude she just picked someone else over you. Sure you might have a rose, but if you know you're her second choice why stick around at that point?
Blaa Blaa Blaa Dragon boats and some filler crap...
Everyone hates Ryan, but Ryan gets the rose on the group date. Much to the ire of Blake, who can't see what she sees in him and why he should even be there if she had and interest in a guy like that.
The date with JP was the usual date, but he has to be the front runner at this point. She talked to him about Bentley and he didn't flip out. Of all the guys on the show, he's the one that I'm having a beer with, he's the most down to Earth. The only question with him that I can see with Ashley is, is he too much of a friend, does she see him more as a friend or a husband? Based on the previews that they showed for the coming weeks, I'm going to to guess that Ashley is soo screwed up that she won't know either and in trying to "protect herself" she'll send him home thinking that they don't have that romantic spark, only to realize her mistake later and want to bring him back. Makes for a great twist and it sure plays out like a Romantic Comedy if I've ever seen one.
(Plot of Romantic Comedy: Girl falls in love with guy, guy is not in love with girl and breaks her heart. Girl then rushes to her guy friend and tells him everything, all the while the guy is secretly crushing on her. Then girl finds a new guy that she is romantically interested in, but she is confused, most likely pushing the friend guy away at some point. Finally she realizes that she isn't really in love with the guy she thought she was, she's missing the guy she sent away. Eventually she sees the friend that she sent away and begs for him to give her another chance. At which time, he says that he always loved her and always will, they go get married and live happily ever after.)
So finally after all of my rambling, we get to the cocktail party... =D
Fresh off her amazing date with JP, Ashley feels that she now has the confidence to tell all of the guys about what was really going on with Bentley. Putting her best spin on it, she says that she now has closure and is ready to move on and is cheerful as ever. The music slowly fades away and the guys now start asking questions, more like ripping into her. The guys have every right to be pissed at her, and they let her know it. After she was led on by Bentley, she essentially led them on as well. Reason says you have to just get over it, in life it's not like you find one person and that is it you date many people and eventually find that right person. The show is an accelerated level of that process, do they have a right to be mad, yes, but take it for what it is. And that includes you Blake, man what an asshole.
It was interesting to see how all of the guys reacted.
Blake - Pissed off, jumped down her throat about it in frustration.
Ames - "I spent the night in a hospital and she thinking about another guy." - actual quote
Mickey - I'm out
Lucas - Just got hit with the freight truck of betrayal. Why didn't he leave? My guess is that his ex-wife cheated on him, so he's just holding on.
Ryan - Ryan was interesting, it didn't really seem to phase him. All of the other guys have a problem with him, but I'm actually coming back to the side that he might not be such a bad guy. He just took it in stride, was that being rational, or something else?
Others - Generally pissed off
Next week will be interesting to see how the guys respond to the news that Ashley had been thinking about another guy the whole time. It's very reasonable for all of them to abandon her as a result, but it's going to be the ones that are genuinely understanding that she should pick to be with. She seemed truly guilty for how she felt, but the guys will have to have their guard up now. Should be interesting, and interestingly enough, everything actually got real on reality TV.
I'm sure next week will let me down.
I find myself in a little bit of a problem writing this blog this morning. The normal side of me wants to just tear into the show once again, because I find enjoyment out of that sort of thing. But the other half of me was struck last night by a feeling of sympathy for poor old Ashley. I mean let's face it, there is TONS of things that could be pulled from the episode last night that would constitute as funny, but now it might just be mean. At the end of the show last night it was hard not to feel bad for her, and that's when we realized that you know what, it's finally become a reality TV show.
But Adam, it's always been a reality show. Right... Last night was interesting because Ashley was completely blown away by how the guys rejected her explanation about Bentley, and that was when it all became real. At that moment, and after watching the show for a couple years with my wife, that was the first time that it really looked like the emotions were 100% genuine. It just always seemed in the past that the emotions were manufactured to a good extent by the situations and the editing, heck even Ashley's feelings for Bentley didn't seem altogether real, and we know where he stood on the whole thing. So watching the guys blow up in her face and her breaking down into tears was refreshing to me, here was reality TV where people actually got hurt by each others actions. Not like getting mad on Survivor that someone betrayed your alliance, "uh duh they're trying to win too, it was only a matter of time" or Keeping up with the Kardassians, "My butt is so big, it's soo hard to be rich and famous for no reason, and then to have people only look at my butt after making a sex tape. It's just soo hard and people don't understand" type of reality.
(Of course Amazing Race is still the best in my opinion, you can't fake a crappy taxi ride in India. Man I'd love to go on that show.)
So with all of that being said, how on Earth can I possibly rip on Ashley and her stripper platform heels? Maybe I'll just have to write this and then come back months later after everyone reads it and sees that I'm going soft and then re-edit in some footage, er I mean text so that I won't look like a tool. If only I knew where to find an example of that type of clever clean up... Oh I know... Last night...
During the first 5 minutes of the show you had Ashley doing a voice over which basically made her sound a lot tougher about the whole Bentley thing than she did last week. I mean ABC would never go back and rework the episode a little bit to make Ashley look a little better now would they??? It's not on the level of Han shooting first, but it's kind of funny that they might do it.
(As for the Han shot first reference, in the original Star Wars, Han Solo is confronted with a bounty hunter in the cantina. When the alien [Geedo] says that he's going to turn him in to Jaba for the bounty, Han shoots and kills him. In the re-editted versions that Lucas has since put out, the movie has been editted so that Greedo shoots at Han and misses and then Han shoots in retaliation. To make it look like Han is a better hero or something.)
Oh sorry I got off on a major tangent there.
So after typing for the last 20 minutes talking about everything except the show, let's talk about the show. Ashley after a night of rewirtting history meets up with Chris in the CONRAD hotel (thank you ABC, if I ever travel to Hong Kong I will make sure that I stay there) at which time Chris tells Ashley that Bentley is there in the hotel. Ashley quickly tells Chris to "shut up". My wife would latter tell me that she wasn't really telling him to shut up, it was just an expression. I'll never understand women...
Anyway she makes her way up to his room, what I want to know is what was she really thinking at this point? Was she thinking that oh boy he came back for me, now we can go get married. Was she thinking, he's here so that I can finally get closure and move on with "the process"? I'm going with the whole narration at the beginning of the show was bullshit and that she wasn't looking for closure, she was really hoping that upon opening that door that he was going to rejoin the show.
So she knocks on the door and he answers, "Who is it?" Really? There is a freakin peep hole in the door you moron. Granted she's only like 4 feet tall, but come on. The conversation after that point is essentially more of him trying to lead her on and that once the show is over she should still come to Salt Lake to see him and see if it works out. At some point I'm guessing that ABC stepped in and told her off camera what he had really said to the cameras so that she would actually be pressed enough to get to the bottom of his crap. And good for Ashley, it really looked genuine where she realized what an idiot that she had been, you go girl! lol
Someone is probably asking, why did Bentley even come back on the show so that she could confront him? Two reasons, more fame, which will play out wonderfully when he is on Bachelor Pad, and the second they gave him a free trip to Hong Kong to stay for 5 days and 6 nights at the luxurious Conrad hotel, located in downtown Hong Kong. While there, he'll enjoy taking in the local cuisine, traveling to the legendary great wall, and, oh wait sorry I'm doing my commercial thing again... (dot dot dot, bastards ruined those for me).
On to date number 1, Lucas the oil man from shithole, I mean Odessa, Texas. Anyone else wonder if he played for the high school football team there? I hear it's a big thing there Friday nights, under the lights...
Fresh on the rebound we found our two lovebirds wondering the streets of Hong Kong in what is the theme this season of shopping in street markets. On the junk the two of them had what looked like a very odd romantic dinner where Lucas went on to tell Ashley about his ex and how that just didn't work out, yada yada yada. I really thought that she wasn't going to give him a rose, they just don't seem like a real couple. Ashley is a women with big city dreams and looks like she wants more than to be a dentist in Philadelphia. Lucas on the other hand is as Western Texas as you can get, he's small town, he works in an oil field, or something like that, seriously he's not too far from Jet and Cord from the Amazing Race last season. It's not an insult, he's just very different than her. But here he is being open and honest with her about his past, and hey he got a rose for it.
Now let's jump to the final part of the show, weren't we all expecting that Lucas was going to give that rose back to Ashley? I mean shouldn't he have? Here he was being open and honest with her and in return she's holding back telling him about what just happened with Bentley the day before. To make matters worse, she actually told JP on their one on one date a couple days later. If I'm Lucas, I'm out. If she feels that she can tell another man about what is going on and her emotions but can't tell me, then who is she closer to? Dude she just picked someone else over you. Sure you might have a rose, but if you know you're her second choice why stick around at that point?
Blaa Blaa Blaa Dragon boats and some filler crap...
Everyone hates Ryan, but Ryan gets the rose on the group date. Much to the ire of Blake, who can't see what she sees in him and why he should even be there if she had and interest in a guy like that.
The date with JP was the usual date, but he has to be the front runner at this point. She talked to him about Bentley and he didn't flip out. Of all the guys on the show, he's the one that I'm having a beer with, he's the most down to Earth. The only question with him that I can see with Ashley is, is he too much of a friend, does she see him more as a friend or a husband? Based on the previews that they showed for the coming weeks, I'm going to to guess that Ashley is soo screwed up that she won't know either and in trying to "protect herself" she'll send him home thinking that they don't have that romantic spark, only to realize her mistake later and want to bring him back. Makes for a great twist and it sure plays out like a Romantic Comedy if I've ever seen one.
(Plot of Romantic Comedy: Girl falls in love with guy, guy is not in love with girl and breaks her heart. Girl then rushes to her guy friend and tells him everything, all the while the guy is secretly crushing on her. Then girl finds a new guy that she is romantically interested in, but she is confused, most likely pushing the friend guy away at some point. Finally she realizes that she isn't really in love with the guy she thought she was, she's missing the guy she sent away. Eventually she sees the friend that she sent away and begs for him to give her another chance. At which time, he says that he always loved her and always will, they go get married and live happily ever after.)
So finally after all of my rambling, we get to the cocktail party... =D
Fresh off her amazing date with JP, Ashley feels that she now has the confidence to tell all of the guys about what was really going on with Bentley. Putting her best spin on it, she says that she now has closure and is ready to move on and is cheerful as ever. The music slowly fades away and the guys now start asking questions, more like ripping into her. The guys have every right to be pissed at her, and they let her know it. After she was led on by Bentley, she essentially led them on as well. Reason says you have to just get over it, in life it's not like you find one person and that is it you date many people and eventually find that right person. The show is an accelerated level of that process, do they have a right to be mad, yes, but take it for what it is. And that includes you Blake, man what an asshole.
It was interesting to see how all of the guys reacted.
Blake - Pissed off, jumped down her throat about it in frustration.
Ames - "I spent the night in a hospital and she thinking about another guy." - actual quote
Mickey - I'm out
Lucas - Just got hit with the freight truck of betrayal. Why didn't he leave? My guess is that his ex-wife cheated on him, so he's just holding on.
Ryan - Ryan was interesting, it didn't really seem to phase him. All of the other guys have a problem with him, but I'm actually coming back to the side that he might not be such a bad guy. He just took it in stride, was that being rational, or something else?
Others - Generally pissed off
Next week will be interesting to see how the guys respond to the news that Ashley had been thinking about another guy the whole time. It's very reasonable for all of them to abandon her as a result, but it's going to be the ones that are genuinely understanding that she should pick to be with. She seemed truly guilty for how she felt, but the guys will have to have their guard up now. Should be interesting, and interestingly enough, everything actually got real on reality TV.
I'm sure next week will let me down.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
The Bachelorette - Fit to be Thai'd
Previously on the Bachelorette, 25 single men travelled to Los Angeles to battle for the affections of one woman. Little did they know that this adventure in love was going to take them around the world to Thailand "the perfect place for a person to fall in love" (wink wink). How could you not, from the constant rain to more rain and then a bunch of 1000 ruins that you aren't allowed to kiss in front of, what could be more romantic? Paris, New York, Hawaii, the local water treatment plant...
Thankfully us the viewers, all of the locals where the Bachelors are sequestered to drink for days on end also serve as train stations for the inevitable train wreck that is ensuing. I heard that this is the worst season yet, and while that may be true (honestly I don't know, I don't pay "that" much attention to it) it has quickly become great fodder to laugh at and not with, yes William I'm looking at you, such the awesome guy. Not only did you make the woman that your "competing" for cry because you said what we were all thinking (we wish the Bachelorette had been one of the other women) but you took an insecure women and cut her down to the 4 foot height that she is, well played sir.
But I'll get to more on Sir William a little bit later, first lets meet our Bachelorette the insecure dentist from Maine (oh yes I watched last year too!) who hopelessly has her head so far up Bentley's ass that she could examine his teeth from the inside. You know who she reminds me of, that chick that was on Millionaire Matchmaker that went out with the super hot guy and was promising to buy him a motorcycle and other stuff, yes Ashley is that desperate for love, well not love, how about attention, yeah that's the word for it.
If she wasn't enough of a basket case last season from the moment in the hot tub (oh crap I was paying lots of attention last year wasn't I?) where she questioned Brad's motives, we should have known then that she was mental. And I'm sorry no amount of hair color is going to change that (looked better as a blond too, and I don't like blonde's, that's saying a lot). So here we are 5 or so weeks into the season half way around the world and all we get to hear is how much she really misses Bentley.
Honestly I am starting to really like Bentley right about now, why? Because without him we'd just get crap like we've gotten to watch the last two weeks, a failed romance on a show that has become a broken premise. Where the couple is probably already broken up by the time the show airs. But with Bentley we get to see the stupidity of a helplessly insecure woman pining over a guy that essentially played her for the fool that she is. If anything Ashley should be a lesson to any young girl out there watching this that there are just some guys that are looking to play you. What is worst is that ABC rather than let her off the hook by showing her the videos of Bentley saying that he was playing her, they let the drama play out in a sick way just to punish this poor girl in the hopes to get more ratings. And you thought that Disney was a nice company, shame on you (ABC is owned by Disney if you were unaware).
So next week we got a quick preview of Ashley having to contain herself from jumping into bed with Bentley right then and there in Hong Kong as I'm sure that he will tell her what he was really thinking. Why would he be honest now? I'm sure that it's a deal with ABC, he gets a trip to Hong Kong and gets to let his infamy grow so that he can be a special villain on Bachelor pad (oh wow do I pay attention to this set of shows). At which time Chris Harrison can stop looking annoyed at Ashley and the guys can start rejecting roses from her once she comes clean with them.
And seriously why wouldn't they reject a rose from this bimbo (yes that is the correct term, I looked it up). She obviously has no interest in any of the guys outside of wanting to be the center of their attention. There is no chemistry between her or any of the guys because she has spent so much time thinking about Bentley (aaahhhhhhhhhhh, Bentley......) And to top it off, as Jen and I were talking, she's not ready for a relationship anyway, she is focused on her career and too worried about having fun rather than settling down (again, see last season). If you ask me she's basically one step up from stripper pole dancer, where the back story is that Daddy didn't love her enough and she does it so that she can feel special from other men.
But I could go on about Ashley for ages, instead let's get to the meat of the episode last night...
First off the date with the Elephant whisperer, who had about as much personality as his J Crew red and blue stripped shorts. Wasn't it so cute how they kind of matched outfits? Anyway nothing was saying romance like walking around in the flea market shopping for tourist bargains and street Thai food. The best moment of the date being where they were posed in front of some ancient temple but weren't allowed to kiss because it was taboo. Ok seriously ABC this is where you are tripping over yourself to try and make something out of nothing. The goal of the shot was to make it look like there was some built up sexual tension between the two of them, instead what we got was an awkward conversation about the weather (ok maybe it wasn't about the weather, but were you really paying attention at that point either?). The date mercifully ending in the middle of a neat flower arrangement with the two of them kissing and some guy spitting fire. I guess that this was supposed to be the firey release of all that tension from the day. Seriously ABC, just stop your embarrassing yourself here.
Date 2, the group date...
"Gentlemen, welcome to fight club" man would I have loved to have seen Tyler Durden pop out and start making soap (sorry had to reassert some masculinity), I'm sure Ames saw him anyway, probably told the doctor that he fell down some stairs. Ok enough with the Fight Club jokes, they were for me.
My question with the whole boxing thing was, why? Was it to make it look like they were fighting over Ashley, if so wouldn't you volunteer to get your ass kicked? Or was it to make them look like manly men? Or just to put one of the guys in pink shorts to get a couple quick jokes? Honestly there wasn't another color than Pink in the whole rainbow?
"Why do I have to be Mr. Pink?" - Reservoir Dogs
My guess is that the whole thing was kind of a set up where at least one of them was going to get hurt and ABC knew it. The question being how would Ashley respond to the guy that got hurt, would she rush to his bedside to see if he was ok? Uh nope, bye Ames, I have all these other guys to go spend time with who are concious. Was it to see if she was going to be attracted to the "toughest" guy there? Didn't really matter anyway, the whole time the blood sport was going on all she could think about was Bentley anyway. So go ahead guys beat the crap out of each other, she "really cares"...
The best three moments on the rest of the date were. One when Ashley was feeling bad for some reason and Ryan decided that it was a great time to just talk about himself, now I see why she likes him. Two when Ames shows up and looks like he just landed on another planet, that was great. And Third when she game the rose to the first guy that said he needed reassurance, and not the guy that was sent to the hospital, classy!
And finally the 2 on 1 date, since they already stole my Mad Max joke, I guess I can't make another one. Let's just call this date what it was douches for elephants, which honestly might have been more interesting (note to self hit up youtube to test that theory... I'm kidding, I'll use justin.tv =) ). Right out of the gate Sir William tells Ashley that the other guy (don't know his name or care) was talking about looking into online dating when he got back after the show. Instantly she gets up and tells the other guy that the date is over and that he's taking the first raft back to the states. Way to go Ashley, I'm sure he was a douche, but you didn't even talk to him, classy!
Later on you kind of knew what was coming, Sir William being the awesome uneducated cell phone salesman that he is was feeling pretty awesome for himself. Right up until Ashley decided that she was changing service providers (ok that was cheesy).
In the end it's sad that JP and Ames seem to actually like Ashley, why is beyond me, but hey someone for everyone right. And since those guys seem pretty cool, hopefully for them they will find what they are looking for.
Until next week (oh yeah I might just have to keep this up, hell I'm watching this train wreck anyway) stay classy!
Thankfully us the viewers, all of the locals where the Bachelors are sequestered to drink for days on end also serve as train stations for the inevitable train wreck that is ensuing. I heard that this is the worst season yet, and while that may be true (honestly I don't know, I don't pay "that" much attention to it) it has quickly become great fodder to laugh at and not with, yes William I'm looking at you, such the awesome guy. Not only did you make the woman that your "competing" for cry because you said what we were all thinking (we wish the Bachelorette had been one of the other women) but you took an insecure women and cut her down to the 4 foot height that she is, well played sir.
But I'll get to more on Sir William a little bit later, first lets meet our Bachelorette the insecure dentist from Maine (oh yes I watched last year too!) who hopelessly has her head so far up Bentley's ass that she could examine his teeth from the inside. You know who she reminds me of, that chick that was on Millionaire Matchmaker that went out with the super hot guy and was promising to buy him a motorcycle and other stuff, yes Ashley is that desperate for love, well not love, how about attention, yeah that's the word for it.
If she wasn't enough of a basket case last season from the moment in the hot tub (oh crap I was paying lots of attention last year wasn't I?) where she questioned Brad's motives, we should have known then that she was mental. And I'm sorry no amount of hair color is going to change that (looked better as a blond too, and I don't like blonde's, that's saying a lot). So here we are 5 or so weeks into the season half way around the world and all we get to hear is how much she really misses Bentley.
Honestly I am starting to really like Bentley right about now, why? Because without him we'd just get crap like we've gotten to watch the last two weeks, a failed romance on a show that has become a broken premise. Where the couple is probably already broken up by the time the show airs. But with Bentley we get to see the stupidity of a helplessly insecure woman pining over a guy that essentially played her for the fool that she is. If anything Ashley should be a lesson to any young girl out there watching this that there are just some guys that are looking to play you. What is worst is that ABC rather than let her off the hook by showing her the videos of Bentley saying that he was playing her, they let the drama play out in a sick way just to punish this poor girl in the hopes to get more ratings. And you thought that Disney was a nice company, shame on you (ABC is owned by Disney if you were unaware).
So next week we got a quick preview of Ashley having to contain herself from jumping into bed with Bentley right then and there in Hong Kong as I'm sure that he will tell her what he was really thinking. Why would he be honest now? I'm sure that it's a deal with ABC, he gets a trip to Hong Kong and gets to let his infamy grow so that he can be a special villain on Bachelor pad (oh wow do I pay attention to this set of shows). At which time Chris Harrison can stop looking annoyed at Ashley and the guys can start rejecting roses from her once she comes clean with them.
And seriously why wouldn't they reject a rose from this bimbo (yes that is the correct term, I looked it up). She obviously has no interest in any of the guys outside of wanting to be the center of their attention. There is no chemistry between her or any of the guys because she has spent so much time thinking about Bentley (aaahhhhhhhhhhh, Bentley......) And to top it off, as Jen and I were talking, she's not ready for a relationship anyway, she is focused on her career and too worried about having fun rather than settling down (again, see last season). If you ask me she's basically one step up from stripper pole dancer, where the back story is that Daddy didn't love her enough and she does it so that she can feel special from other men.
But I could go on about Ashley for ages, instead let's get to the meat of the episode last night...
First off the date with the Elephant whisperer, who had about as much personality as his J Crew red and blue stripped shorts. Wasn't it so cute how they kind of matched outfits? Anyway nothing was saying romance like walking around in the flea market shopping for tourist bargains and street Thai food. The best moment of the date being where they were posed in front of some ancient temple but weren't allowed to kiss because it was taboo. Ok seriously ABC this is where you are tripping over yourself to try and make something out of nothing. The goal of the shot was to make it look like there was some built up sexual tension between the two of them, instead what we got was an awkward conversation about the weather (ok maybe it wasn't about the weather, but were you really paying attention at that point either?). The date mercifully ending in the middle of a neat flower arrangement with the two of them kissing and some guy spitting fire. I guess that this was supposed to be the firey release of all that tension from the day. Seriously ABC, just stop your embarrassing yourself here.
Date 2, the group date...
"Gentlemen, welcome to fight club" man would I have loved to have seen Tyler Durden pop out and start making soap (sorry had to reassert some masculinity), I'm sure Ames saw him anyway, probably told the doctor that he fell down some stairs. Ok enough with the Fight Club jokes, they were for me.
My question with the whole boxing thing was, why? Was it to make it look like they were fighting over Ashley, if so wouldn't you volunteer to get your ass kicked? Or was it to make them look like manly men? Or just to put one of the guys in pink shorts to get a couple quick jokes? Honestly there wasn't another color than Pink in the whole rainbow?
"Why do I have to be Mr. Pink?" - Reservoir Dogs
My guess is that the whole thing was kind of a set up where at least one of them was going to get hurt and ABC knew it. The question being how would Ashley respond to the guy that got hurt, would she rush to his bedside to see if he was ok? Uh nope, bye Ames, I have all these other guys to go spend time with who are concious. Was it to see if she was going to be attracted to the "toughest" guy there? Didn't really matter anyway, the whole time the blood sport was going on all she could think about was Bentley anyway. So go ahead guys beat the crap out of each other, she "really cares"...
The best three moments on the rest of the date were. One when Ashley was feeling bad for some reason and Ryan decided that it was a great time to just talk about himself, now I see why she likes him. Two when Ames shows up and looks like he just landed on another planet, that was great. And Third when she game the rose to the first guy that said he needed reassurance, and not the guy that was sent to the hospital, classy!
And finally the 2 on 1 date, since they already stole my Mad Max joke, I guess I can't make another one. Let's just call this date what it was douches for elephants, which honestly might have been more interesting (note to self hit up youtube to test that theory... I'm kidding, I'll use justin.tv =) ). Right out of the gate Sir William tells Ashley that the other guy (don't know his name or care) was talking about looking into online dating when he got back after the show. Instantly she gets up and tells the other guy that the date is over and that he's taking the first raft back to the states. Way to go Ashley, I'm sure he was a douche, but you didn't even talk to him, classy!
Later on you kind of knew what was coming, Sir William being the awesome uneducated cell phone salesman that he is was feeling pretty awesome for himself. Right up until Ashley decided that she was changing service providers (ok that was cheesy).
In the end it's sad that JP and Ames seem to actually like Ashley, why is beyond me, but hey someone for everyone right. And since those guys seem pretty cool, hopefully for them they will find what they are looking for.
Until next week (oh yeah I might just have to keep this up, hell I'm watching this train wreck anyway) stay classy!
Friday, August 6, 2010
Fianl take on Lost
Ok yes it has been a couple months, but after much thought I've kind of reached a point where I need to dump on Lost. Sure it's old news, but with the complete season coming out on August 24th, there is still a little relevance to it.
Tony and I have had small conversations about the show and how he thought the ending was crap, personally I was ok with it, but like someone creeping into my dreams and telling me that I wasn't totally satisfied with the ending, the top has been turning in my head to the point where something has just been bugging me. And if you caught the Inception reference then that is a good thing because I'm going to be using that to talk about how I have a problem with Lost.
I was fine with the character resolution, I was fine with the purgatory ending, while I know a lot of people weren't satisfied with them, I was ok with it. The producers of the show always maintained that the show was about the characters and I think the ending actually did a good justice to resolve their arcs. What has been gnawing at me is the lack of explanation for all of the crazy stuff that happened on the show. Dharma, Time travel, the light, etc... all of the stuff that we spend so much time trying to decipher and here is why.
Over the last six years we spent a good deal of time wondering how all of these puzzle pieces would come together, in the end we never got to see the final picture, we were given clues to the end but never a full picture. Instead the producers would rather tell you that we should have given a crap about if Kate was going to end up with Sawyer or Jack, to which I think the majority of us that were there in the ending really didn't care about. I mean sure we had emotional investment into the characters, but were we really worried about how their stories were going to end? We just hoped that our favorites weren't going to die every week. I mean seriously after season 3 the growth of the majority of the characters had been locked down, so we cared, but we were more interested week by week by the mystery that was unfolding before our eyes every week. And if you really cared about the relationships between all of the characters then you're in luck, I'm going to do a write up next season for The Bachelor, oh yeah you read that correct, I'm going to rip that show apart since I end up watching half of the season with Jen anyway, should be a hoot!
Getting back to my point the mysteries were what keep us coming back, Lost was a sci-fi show at it's core, not Grey's Anatomy. And by making us spend so much time wondering about mysteries that didn't have answers I think all of us feel cheated. Sure any good show is about characters that exist in a fictional world, but we buy into the world where they live because the characters are a part of that world. If you buy into the world as a device to tell a story then you want to have faith that that world matters, in Lost it didn't. I've commented to Jen a couple of times that the key to a great fantasy or sci-fi world is the depth and detail that it contains. As examples:
Lord of the Rings - Those movies made that world come to life in a way that I really felt it actually existed.
Harry Potter - JK Rowling did such an amazing job with that world that you believe that it all takes place in some other world that she gets to visit and come back to tell us about. Talking about the books here, not the movies. If you want to be a part of a different world, read those books.
World of Warcraft - Ok ok, I know you're laughing right now but the amount of detail that goes into that world and the story itself are pretty impressive. And while I've been able to put it aside I could go into detail on the back story of the characters and places that exist in that world.
And I think that is the thing with me, when I invest my time into some form of media, be it movies, books, or games, I want to dive all the way in. I want to be swept up and taken away to another place so that I can get a glimpse of that world. Lost did that, but in the end the illusion was broken.
The simple explanation for feeling cheated is that they didn't answer the questions, but I don't think that is what really bugs me, I watched Inception (told you I'd get back to this) and while I didn't think it was the greatest thing I've ever seen, I really really liked it, even with the twist ending, which I won't ruin if you haven't seen it. But in the end, they left a major question for you to ponder as you walked out of the theater, and you're not going to get an answer to it. So why am I ok with that, but not with the Lost questions? Two reasons, one I think that Christoper Nolan actually knows the answer, and two it's a question that can be left to interpretation. The questions in Lost were events that took place that were never explained as to the context of how they took place in the world, instead they just happened. In the end the people that were saying that they were making it up as they went (thank you Jen) were given A LOT of creditability and the rest of us were left holding the bag of empty promises. But the producers never promised to answer our questions. True, but by presenting the events in the story they needed to have the ability to answer the questions, which after some time I'm concluded, they can't.
Another great movie with a twist ending was The Sixth Sense. What made the movie great wasn't the twist itself, it's that all of the clues to the twist took place right before your eyes on the screen. There was no magic taking place offstage, you got to see it, you could go back and see the evidence throughout the movie that supported the ending. While Inception doesn't answer the question like Sixth Sense did, I'll bet that you can go back through that movie and find support for whatever ending you like. And just how deep was it? Well I saw a clip where if you take the music that woke them up and slow it down enough it will sound exactly like the horn like sound that happened when something bad was taking place. Why you don't know what happened, there is enough detail hidden in the movie that you can have enough faith to believe that there is enough evidence to support an answer, Lost in the end didn't have that.
Well enough of my rambling, I've just felt Lost without my little blog so I had to put something up that had been bugging me for the last couple weeks.
Tony and I have had small conversations about the show and how he thought the ending was crap, personally I was ok with it, but like someone creeping into my dreams and telling me that I wasn't totally satisfied with the ending, the top has been turning in my head to the point where something has just been bugging me. And if you caught the Inception reference then that is a good thing because I'm going to be using that to talk about how I have a problem with Lost.
I was fine with the character resolution, I was fine with the purgatory ending, while I know a lot of people weren't satisfied with them, I was ok with it. The producers of the show always maintained that the show was about the characters and I think the ending actually did a good justice to resolve their arcs. What has been gnawing at me is the lack of explanation for all of the crazy stuff that happened on the show. Dharma, Time travel, the light, etc... all of the stuff that we spend so much time trying to decipher and here is why.
Over the last six years we spent a good deal of time wondering how all of these puzzle pieces would come together, in the end we never got to see the final picture, we were given clues to the end but never a full picture. Instead the producers would rather tell you that we should have given a crap about if Kate was going to end up with Sawyer or Jack, to which I think the majority of us that were there in the ending really didn't care about. I mean sure we had emotional investment into the characters, but were we really worried about how their stories were going to end? We just hoped that our favorites weren't going to die every week. I mean seriously after season 3 the growth of the majority of the characters had been locked down, so we cared, but we were more interested week by week by the mystery that was unfolding before our eyes every week. And if you really cared about the relationships between all of the characters then you're in luck, I'm going to do a write up next season for The Bachelor, oh yeah you read that correct, I'm going to rip that show apart since I end up watching half of the season with Jen anyway, should be a hoot!
Getting back to my point the mysteries were what keep us coming back, Lost was a sci-fi show at it's core, not Grey's Anatomy. And by making us spend so much time wondering about mysteries that didn't have answers I think all of us feel cheated. Sure any good show is about characters that exist in a fictional world, but we buy into the world where they live because the characters are a part of that world. If you buy into the world as a device to tell a story then you want to have faith that that world matters, in Lost it didn't. I've commented to Jen a couple of times that the key to a great fantasy or sci-fi world is the depth and detail that it contains. As examples:
Lord of the Rings - Those movies made that world come to life in a way that I really felt it actually existed.
Harry Potter - JK Rowling did such an amazing job with that world that you believe that it all takes place in some other world that she gets to visit and come back to tell us about. Talking about the books here, not the movies. If you want to be a part of a different world, read those books.
World of Warcraft - Ok ok, I know you're laughing right now but the amount of detail that goes into that world and the story itself are pretty impressive. And while I've been able to put it aside I could go into detail on the back story of the characters and places that exist in that world.
And I think that is the thing with me, when I invest my time into some form of media, be it movies, books, or games, I want to dive all the way in. I want to be swept up and taken away to another place so that I can get a glimpse of that world. Lost did that, but in the end the illusion was broken.
The simple explanation for feeling cheated is that they didn't answer the questions, but I don't think that is what really bugs me, I watched Inception (told you I'd get back to this) and while I didn't think it was the greatest thing I've ever seen, I really really liked it, even with the twist ending, which I won't ruin if you haven't seen it. But in the end, they left a major question for you to ponder as you walked out of the theater, and you're not going to get an answer to it. So why am I ok with that, but not with the Lost questions? Two reasons, one I think that Christoper Nolan actually knows the answer, and two it's a question that can be left to interpretation. The questions in Lost were events that took place that were never explained as to the context of how they took place in the world, instead they just happened. In the end the people that were saying that they were making it up as they went (thank you Jen) were given A LOT of creditability and the rest of us were left holding the bag of empty promises. But the producers never promised to answer our questions. True, but by presenting the events in the story they needed to have the ability to answer the questions, which after some time I'm concluded, they can't.
Another great movie with a twist ending was The Sixth Sense. What made the movie great wasn't the twist itself, it's that all of the clues to the twist took place right before your eyes on the screen. There was no magic taking place offstage, you got to see it, you could go back and see the evidence throughout the movie that supported the ending. While Inception doesn't answer the question like Sixth Sense did, I'll bet that you can go back through that movie and find support for whatever ending you like. And just how deep was it? Well I saw a clip where if you take the music that woke them up and slow it down enough it will sound exactly like the horn like sound that happened when something bad was taking place. Why you don't know what happened, there is enough detail hidden in the movie that you can have enough faith to believe that there is enough evidence to support an answer, Lost in the end didn't have that.
Well enough of my rambling, I've just felt Lost without my little blog so I had to put something up that had been bugging me for the last couple weeks.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Lost - The End
If you're looking for my take on the finale, you'll have to give me a day to process it. I laughed, I actually cried (yes even me), it left me wanting more (uh movies much?!?!). Overall I think I liked it, a lot actually. I have a feeling that there are going to be a portion of people that feel betrayed, but to me I feel like I saw an ending that was fitting for the end of the show. Was there a bunch of stuff left open? Yeah there was, but I didn't feel cheated, if that means anything. Going to wonder for a long time how David fits into the story because that is one huge massive gaping hole.
Anyway give me a day and I'll have a lot to say on the show, heck it's the end right, and my blog gets to go with it, so I might as well go out with a bang.
Anyway give me a day and I'll have a lot to say on the show, heck it's the end right, and my blog gets to go with it, so I might as well go out with a bang.
Friday, May 21, 2010
Lost - Before "The End"
So this is really my last chance to make any real guesses at the end of Lost. That being said and the amount of stuff that I've gotten wrong, why not just one last hurrah for old times sake, before I toss my TV out the window forever. Which would be an accomplishment, for anyone that has seen it, I really did get that TV just to watch Lost.
Ben is and has always been a bad guy working for Smokey - After this past week it really seemed to me that Ben was all more than willing to hook up again with his Sith Lord. The line that really cemented it was that he was the one being summoned, not him summoning the monster. Now this doesn't seem to fit in with the narrative too well considering that Ben was taking notes from Richard and had killed off a good portion of people. But after seeing Jacob's regret at killing his own brother I can't imagine that Jacob would want to see anyone else die by his hand. To me no matter how bad they became, he would think that they could still be redeemed given the right chance. It's an innocent and naive view of humanity, but at the same time he hasn't ordered anyone to kill anyone that I remember. So let's say he brings Dharma to the island, it's a group of people that are looking to build a Utopian society on the island, but over time it falls apart as members of the group start to want to tap into the power of the island. In the end they are all killed by Ben...
Ben while a weird kid before getting shot by Sayid gets even further out there after his dip in the temple waters. After his resurrection is when he starts seeing ghosts and when he finds Richard in the jungle and tells him that he wants to join the others. Eventually he does and proceeds to gas the Dharma folks, killing everyone on the island. Did those orders come from Jacob? They may have as Dharma was getting closer to messing with the island, or it could have been Smokey giving Ben the order. Smokey couldn't get past the fences, but with Ben on the inside he could have him kill them all, thereby finishing off all of the candidates for that round. This one could go either way, but it seems like a heavy burden on Jacob to have killed them all...
When we saw Widmore he says that he was told how to get to the island by Jacob, we have to assume that is true because Jacob said that he was bringing someone to the island and with only one episode left that pretty much locks it up that it was Widmore. If that is the case then I'm going to assume that Widmore has had the interest of the island in mind since the beginning but was prevented on getting back because Jacob thought that Ben was his guy. In the end Widmore is the good guy (well sort of). So what about all of the people that Ben had Sayid kill off the island? I'm going to assume that it ties in, anything from the second half of season 3 on is pretty much game considering that was when they negotiated the end date for the show. So why kill off all of Widmore's people? My guess is that those were the remaining candidates that Jacob had and Ben was doing the work for Smokey, killing people off before they could even get to the island...
How did Ben have this type of knowledge, from the cabin of course. The cabin hasn't been fully explained, but it was burned to the ground so hopefully that isn't the end of that. Anyway, Ben took Locke there in season 3 or 4 to fool him into thinking that Ben still had some power over the island. Ben said that he put on a show for Locke, my guess is that Smokey was there all along and was giving Ben orders on what to do. One of those is inflating Locke's ego and position that he is the protector of the island under the guise of Jacob. In the end this is the great move that Smokey plays on Locke, getting him to think that he has to die to protect the island, but really so that he can take over Locke's body. In the end, Ben moves the island first so that he can be in the present world waiting for Locke to come along and put the island in it's place. Ben gets to the real world first so that he is there to kill Locke, and bring him back to the island for Smokey. My guess is that Ben doesn't really know that he's working for Locke, or what the full plan is, but with his thirst for power and his ability to lie, you'd have to think that Smokey has had an eye on him for quite a while. I guess we'll see on Sunday, but it wouldn't surprise me if we find out just how evil Ben really is. On the flip side, the way that he is showing such sadness in the sideways world being around Alex, we might see that soul redeem itself. Ben could be the one that kills Smokey.
The Dharma food drop - Knowing that that Swan was real it makes sense that they would need to keep that button a pushing even after the death of everyone during the purge. Kelvin was recruited into Dharma long after the purge, by my guesses he had to have been brought in around 99 or 00. Desmond said that he had been there for 3 years, which means that he crashed in 2001. Regardless Dharma was wiped out no later than 80 if my numbers are correct. That is an extra 20 years of button pushing that needs to be accounted for. Dharma gets wiped out but the button will need to be pushed into eternity, thus they set up a food drop to resupply that hatch over and over again. In an earlier episode the others make comment that the castaways weren't supposed to interfere with that. My guess is that the others knew exactly what was going on down there, as evidenced by the Pearl station and just allowed Desmond to sit there and push the button. Whoever was trapped in there would get the food from time to time, being alerted as the blast doors when down and with the quarantine on the doors and a fear of sickness on the outside (ie, Smokey) you had a supplied crew forever.
No babies - Ben said that Jacob wanted a baby to be born on the island, yet Richard didn't really understand the extra amount of resources that were put into this activity. Odd, Richard was the one getting the past notes, yet he didn't understand the baby making process??? My thought again is that it was Smokey trying to find himself a body to take hold of so that he could become human again, and leave the island. They never covered this in full and left it wide open, which is really sad because it's a pretty big mystery, hell the statue was an Egyptian fertility god. This of course all works into Ben being a bad guy once again.
And now for the hardest guess of them all, what is the deal with the sideways world? - This is really a shot in the dark because we really haven't been given very much of anything as to what this world is supposed to be. I've guessed that it's a wish fulfillment land, or even it's hell, but the way that the last episode ended with Hurley in a really good mood in sideways world and his new love of Libby discovered, I have a new one. So far we've only seen the memories from the island world translate over to the sideways world, is it possible that the memories can work the other way around? Now why the hell would anyone want to see their wonderful life in the sideways world (ok it's not wonderful, but in many cases better) answer is, they wouldn't. But what if they have to? Dieing in one world doesn't seem to be having much of an effect on the people living in the sideways world, or else I think we'd have seen Libby a little more bonkers, even Sun, Jin, or Sayid (not sure who all woke up, not Sayid I guess). So let's concentrate on Libby, she put herself in a mental hospital because she thought that she was crazy, turns out that she wasn't, but I'm also guessing that she knew that she died in the other timeline, that wouldn't be a thing I'd want to remember, so I'll guess that she doesn't know. Stay with me here....
Now we'll never get the full story on Libby so I won't go there, but what I was getting at was that even people that died on the island have a full download of island life in their sideways world. I have to guess that things work both ways, if so then the key might be someone that died on the island, but is still there, Locke. Earlier this season he uttered the famous line, "Don't tell me what I can't do." That itself suggested that maybe somewhere in there was the old Locke. Is it possible that the body of Locke got a quick jolt of sideways world memories, but buried underneath Smokey. Was island Locke's soul still there hearing the echo from the sideways? My guess is yes....
Killing Smokey is going to come down to a couple different options; the knife (don't let them talk to you) fyi mommy didn't say anything before she was stabbed in the back. Tossing Smokey back down into the light, going to go with no there because Jacob said that's where he has been trying to get back to. Someone else jumping in the light, again don't think so because they would most likely become a Smoke monster. Little tangent on the Smoke monster... The crazy mom lady was a Smoke monster and the protector of the island. At some point in the past she took a look down there and found out what happens to you. As she told the boys, it's a fate worse than death. Also how was that village destroyed by one women??? My guess she was a Smokey too.
But getting to my final and what I think is going to be it answer to how they kill Smokey. It will be when Locke is able to walk again, part of him is going to download back to the island and at that point know what happen to his body and how he was manipulated and used by the Smoke monster. At that point he'll do something that will destroy the Smoke monster from within, Locke will take control over his own body on the island and force the monster to commit suicide.
To everyone that has played along with me over the years, it's sad to see all of our fun coming to an end so soon. If anyone has any final guesses that you'd like to throw out there, add them as comments at the bottom and we'll see how we all did in "The End"
Ben is and has always been a bad guy working for Smokey - After this past week it really seemed to me that Ben was all more than willing to hook up again with his Sith Lord. The line that really cemented it was that he was the one being summoned, not him summoning the monster. Now this doesn't seem to fit in with the narrative too well considering that Ben was taking notes from Richard and had killed off a good portion of people. But after seeing Jacob's regret at killing his own brother I can't imagine that Jacob would want to see anyone else die by his hand. To me no matter how bad they became, he would think that they could still be redeemed given the right chance. It's an innocent and naive view of humanity, but at the same time he hasn't ordered anyone to kill anyone that I remember. So let's say he brings Dharma to the island, it's a group of people that are looking to build a Utopian society on the island, but over time it falls apart as members of the group start to want to tap into the power of the island. In the end they are all killed by Ben...
Ben while a weird kid before getting shot by Sayid gets even further out there after his dip in the temple waters. After his resurrection is when he starts seeing ghosts and when he finds Richard in the jungle and tells him that he wants to join the others. Eventually he does and proceeds to gas the Dharma folks, killing everyone on the island. Did those orders come from Jacob? They may have as Dharma was getting closer to messing with the island, or it could have been Smokey giving Ben the order. Smokey couldn't get past the fences, but with Ben on the inside he could have him kill them all, thereby finishing off all of the candidates for that round. This one could go either way, but it seems like a heavy burden on Jacob to have killed them all...
When we saw Widmore he says that he was told how to get to the island by Jacob, we have to assume that is true because Jacob said that he was bringing someone to the island and with only one episode left that pretty much locks it up that it was Widmore. If that is the case then I'm going to assume that Widmore has had the interest of the island in mind since the beginning but was prevented on getting back because Jacob thought that Ben was his guy. In the end Widmore is the good guy (well sort of). So what about all of the people that Ben had Sayid kill off the island? I'm going to assume that it ties in, anything from the second half of season 3 on is pretty much game considering that was when they negotiated the end date for the show. So why kill off all of Widmore's people? My guess is that those were the remaining candidates that Jacob had and Ben was doing the work for Smokey, killing people off before they could even get to the island...
How did Ben have this type of knowledge, from the cabin of course. The cabin hasn't been fully explained, but it was burned to the ground so hopefully that isn't the end of that. Anyway, Ben took Locke there in season 3 or 4 to fool him into thinking that Ben still had some power over the island. Ben said that he put on a show for Locke, my guess is that Smokey was there all along and was giving Ben orders on what to do. One of those is inflating Locke's ego and position that he is the protector of the island under the guise of Jacob. In the end this is the great move that Smokey plays on Locke, getting him to think that he has to die to protect the island, but really so that he can take over Locke's body. In the end, Ben moves the island first so that he can be in the present world waiting for Locke to come along and put the island in it's place. Ben gets to the real world first so that he is there to kill Locke, and bring him back to the island for Smokey. My guess is that Ben doesn't really know that he's working for Locke, or what the full plan is, but with his thirst for power and his ability to lie, you'd have to think that Smokey has had an eye on him for quite a while. I guess we'll see on Sunday, but it wouldn't surprise me if we find out just how evil Ben really is. On the flip side, the way that he is showing such sadness in the sideways world being around Alex, we might see that soul redeem itself. Ben could be the one that kills Smokey.
The Dharma food drop - Knowing that that Swan was real it makes sense that they would need to keep that button a pushing even after the death of everyone during the purge. Kelvin was recruited into Dharma long after the purge, by my guesses he had to have been brought in around 99 or 00. Desmond said that he had been there for 3 years, which means that he crashed in 2001. Regardless Dharma was wiped out no later than 80 if my numbers are correct. That is an extra 20 years of button pushing that needs to be accounted for. Dharma gets wiped out but the button will need to be pushed into eternity, thus they set up a food drop to resupply that hatch over and over again. In an earlier episode the others make comment that the castaways weren't supposed to interfere with that. My guess is that the others knew exactly what was going on down there, as evidenced by the Pearl station and just allowed Desmond to sit there and push the button. Whoever was trapped in there would get the food from time to time, being alerted as the blast doors when down and with the quarantine on the doors and a fear of sickness on the outside (ie, Smokey) you had a supplied crew forever.
No babies - Ben said that Jacob wanted a baby to be born on the island, yet Richard didn't really understand the extra amount of resources that were put into this activity. Odd, Richard was the one getting the past notes, yet he didn't understand the baby making process??? My thought again is that it was Smokey trying to find himself a body to take hold of so that he could become human again, and leave the island. They never covered this in full and left it wide open, which is really sad because it's a pretty big mystery, hell the statue was an Egyptian fertility god. This of course all works into Ben being a bad guy once again.
And now for the hardest guess of them all, what is the deal with the sideways world? - This is really a shot in the dark because we really haven't been given very much of anything as to what this world is supposed to be. I've guessed that it's a wish fulfillment land, or even it's hell, but the way that the last episode ended with Hurley in a really good mood in sideways world and his new love of Libby discovered, I have a new one. So far we've only seen the memories from the island world translate over to the sideways world, is it possible that the memories can work the other way around? Now why the hell would anyone want to see their wonderful life in the sideways world (ok it's not wonderful, but in many cases better) answer is, they wouldn't. But what if they have to? Dieing in one world doesn't seem to be having much of an effect on the people living in the sideways world, or else I think we'd have seen Libby a little more bonkers, even Sun, Jin, or Sayid (not sure who all woke up, not Sayid I guess). So let's concentrate on Libby, she put herself in a mental hospital because she thought that she was crazy, turns out that she wasn't, but I'm also guessing that she knew that she died in the other timeline, that wouldn't be a thing I'd want to remember, so I'll guess that she doesn't know. Stay with me here....
Now we'll never get the full story on Libby so I won't go there, but what I was getting at was that even people that died on the island have a full download of island life in their sideways world. I have to guess that things work both ways, if so then the key might be someone that died on the island, but is still there, Locke. Earlier this season he uttered the famous line, "Don't tell me what I can't do." That itself suggested that maybe somewhere in there was the old Locke. Is it possible that the body of Locke got a quick jolt of sideways world memories, but buried underneath Smokey. Was island Locke's soul still there hearing the echo from the sideways? My guess is yes....
Killing Smokey is going to come down to a couple different options; the knife (don't let them talk to you) fyi mommy didn't say anything before she was stabbed in the back. Tossing Smokey back down into the light, going to go with no there because Jacob said that's where he has been trying to get back to. Someone else jumping in the light, again don't think so because they would most likely become a Smoke monster. Little tangent on the Smoke monster... The crazy mom lady was a Smoke monster and the protector of the island. At some point in the past she took a look down there and found out what happens to you. As she told the boys, it's a fate worse than death. Also how was that village destroyed by one women??? My guess she was a Smokey too.
But getting to my final and what I think is going to be it answer to how they kill Smokey. It will be when Locke is able to walk again, part of him is going to download back to the island and at that point know what happen to his body and how he was manipulated and used by the Smoke monster. At that point he'll do something that will destroy the Smoke monster from within, Locke will take control over his own body on the island and force the monster to commit suicide.
To everyone that has played along with me over the years, it's sad to see all of our fun coming to an end so soon. If anyone has any final guesses that you'd like to throw out there, add them as comments at the bottom and we'll see how we all did in "The End"
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